Capturing Memories

Remembering Home
©2000 by Cathy Fulton

Facilitating a Lifewriting Group is Easy We spend many, many hours at home. Understandably, our most vivid memories are of homes we have lived in and the events that took place in them. For this reason, recalling the homes from your life may be an easy way to begin your memoir writing experience.

It is important to write, not just think, about your past. The process of writing has an almost magical effect on the memory. As you write your stories, you will recall more stories and more details about your life. You will think of questions to ask relatives. Often, story ideas come to mind faster than you can write them down.

Begin by making a list of all the homes you have lived in. Include addresses, phone numbers, and dates if you can recall them. Don't forget the home you live in now.

For some people, a home that was not your own may also be important. For example, one woman wrote stories about her grandparents' home because she had spent so many memorable summers there as a child. Another practically lived with a friend's family as a teenager because her life in her own home was so stressful. If you spent time in homes that were not your own, list them too. Don't forget to list the places you lived that weren't actually houses: military barracks, student housing or dorm, boarding house, etc.

Now you are ready to begin. Choose one of the homes you listed and create an "annotated floor plan" of your home. You don't have to be an artist. This is simply an exercise to help you recall what living in this home was like. Of course, you can later incorporate the floor plan into your memoirs. It will really give your reader a feel for what this place was like. Here is an example of a roughly sketched annotated floor plan:

Floor Plan
(click on sketch for larger version)

Some ideas for annotations:

  • Include special furniture (for example, my dad had a reclining chair—it was his chair, and everyone knew it).
  • Where did the family spend most of its time together? Living room? Den?
  • Where did you do your homework (if this is a childhood home)?
  • Were there formal and informal dining areas? Who sat where at the table?
  • What kinds of appliances were used? TV? Radio?
  • Where was laundry done? Where were the storage areas?
  • What kind of curtains were there? Wallpaper?
  • What could you see out the front window?

Keep Post-it® notes or a scratch pad handy for jotting down questions and ideas. Some people like to put their story ideas on a Post-it® and stick it on the floor plan next to the area of the house that inspired it.

As you work, you will think of more things to write about. Your annotated floor plan can be as detailed as you like. Draw your plan on a large piece of paper, which will provide lots of space for annotations. Most copy centers will sell you blank sheets of 11" X 17" paper, which can be folded to fit in a folder or notebook.

Once you have completed your floor plan, start writing some of the stories and descriptions that it inspires. Here is one starting point: While referring to your annotated floor plan, take us on a tour of the house. Pretend you are bringing us to your home for the first time. Bring us in the door you usually use, and then take us through the house and show us around. Introduce us to family members in each room. Describe what they are doing. For example, perhaps your mom is in the kitchen fixing dinner. Dad may be reading the evening paper. This is a good opportunity to practice creating "dialog." Consider their typical activities.

Here are some more memory kindling questions. They are meant to make you think about the topics. Dwell on them a few minutes and then elaborate on the answer with details. Describe smells, sounds, feelings. Details are priceless! Don't worry about being too specific. Your readers want to know the nitty-gritty about your life. What you ate for Sunday dinner and how it was prepared is interesting. Most writers err on the side of being too general. Don't give an overview—get specific.

  • Describe a typical school/work day in this house. A typical weekend day.
  • What hobbies did you have in this home? Why did you pursue them? Did others help you?
  • Was any room special and reserved for guests only? Which guests were privileged enough to warrant their use?
  • When did you move away? Why? Did you return? To live? To visit?

We usually have more photographs taken in our homes than in any other place. Look past the people in those photos and you will see many objects that will also kindle memories. (See "Write the Stories Behind Your Photos.")

Use a notebook or file folders to organize your writing activities. Create a separate folder or section of your notebook for each home you lived in. File your stories, vignettes, and captioned photos in these sections until you have a collection which you can compose into a book or incorporate into your memoirs.

Don't worry whether your writing is interesting enough—it is. I have listened to countless readings of reminiscences, and I am always drawn into the story—whether it is written "well" or not. There is so much heart and soul placed in these stories that an uninteresting one would be quite rare. And never worry that your family won't appreciate your work. Think about how wonderful it would be to have your grandparents' stories written in their own hand! Yours will be no less cherished.

If you would like more writing exercises to help you recall the homes of your life, you may wish to purchase our Memory Kindling Booklet Remembering Home.

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For more information, contact Capturing Memories, 9228 SW 209th Street, Vashon, WA 98070, (206) 463-5652, www.capturingmemories.com, stories@capturingmemories.com.